BRAT BITCH IN. BARBIE BITCH OUT.

Singer/songwriter Charli XCX dubbed summer 2024 “Brat Girl Summer” after the release of her latest album, Brat. Many manifestations of this trend exist. To me, brat summer means serving bitch girl energy straight up rather than gossiping in secret; besides, backstabbing someone reeks so last season.

For those wondering, brat does not equal bitch; quite the opposite actually. Remember Arte Fact from Webkinz? He couldn’t care less that 8 year old Helena messed up during his gem mining game. After 3 failed attempts, he booted my ass out of the quarry. Arte Fact delivered B.R.A.T. energy.

Barbie, on the other hand, could never serve Brat. No amount of Barbie press by my beloved Margot Robbie could convince me that Barbie wouldn’t discuss my pant size with half my high school (and trust me, most of the kids I went to school with sucked).

To translate brat into an energy for us everyday folk: I need you to think rainboots, short-shorts, and back-buttoned blouses at the pub–extra points if the shorts display the word all-star on the ass. The back-buttoned blouse reminds me of a mullet–demure in the front but Madonna in her Like a Virgin church music video in the back. The rainboots give childish yet chaotic–like, what the fuck, it’s summer, your calves must be sweltering but also gives the la-la-la energy like I love running through fields and making crowns out of daisies! The short-shorts advertise a come and get it vibe but also suggest lazy, like, I never intended for you to find me attractive in these pants type aura. 

…

For my fellow Americans, our democratic nominees for the upcoming presidential election radiate brat energy. Kamala Harris and her VP candidate bashing Trump to his face. Brat.

What else do I find bratty? Trump’s supporters. His own supporters mock him to his face by wearing tape over their ears to show solidarity for his wound incurred during his almost fateful rally. The Trump fandom…B.R.A.T. 

With brat, we all unite. Your ex? A brat. Your estranged dad? A brat. They didn’t want you and they left right in front of your face. B.R.A.T.